Messy Night Owl

All day I was thinking about what to write about today.

What link-up to join so people could see my blog.

What people would be interested in.

How I should do another fashion post because those are fun and people like those.

Or maybe another post on something spiritual because then I can converse back and forth on what I believe.

Blah blah.

Noise.

I didn't create this blog to write noise.

 I started it to express my thoughts, feelings and share my life.

Not that I really thought I had an interesting life but I wanted somewhere to write where I could always connect and be inspired by other people. 

I wanted to inspire people. 

However, my life is messy. 

Why would I ever want to tell people I have hard time keeping my apartment clean when I only work a part time job?

That I'm still really angry at my Dad for leaving.

That I have no clue what I want to do with my life career wise?

That I struggle to apologize when I'm wrong.

That I wish certain friends were still in my life even though they treated me like crap.

That I'm not perfect.

I read a lot of blogs. So many it hurts my head because then it spins with information I have no clue what to do with. I read a lot of the same stories. See a lot of the same outfits. See the same makeup tutorials. 

The list goes on.

I want to read about people.

About their lives.

Their struggles.

Hurts.

Joys.

Passions.

Life.

I love looking through the window into someone else's world and wondering what their life is like. It's easy to paint a beautiful picture of life through blogging. You only show what you want others to see.

I want to be seen.

I want to be seen even if people don't like everything I write.

I want a free place to write & share even if it's only to a few people.

That's okay. 

I'm not looking for an audience.

I'm looking for connections.

I have made those already and it's just incredible and mind blowing to me how I have connected with people I have never met in real life. Maybe I never will. But I have connected with people and shared deeper thoughts with people I am closest to in "real life"

I have a story. 

You have a story. 

 I want to read and connect with those stories. Even through this web.

How crazy modern our world is now.

But I'm a woman with many thoughts, emotions, creativity, messiness, sarcasm and a keyboard.

A keyboard to write on this little blog of mine and type every thought and emotion I am willing to actually share with this big world I live in. 

Life is so damn messy & I'm okay with that. I'm not perfect. I stay up wayyyy to late for my own good and then you get posts like this!

You're welcome.

Love Forever,

Chel Chel